I don’t feel young, I know that for sure. I remember what young feels like and this isn’t it.
I don’t think I feel old either, although perhaps I do. Perhaps this is what old feels like?
Perhaps there is no old.
Perhaps there’s just evolution. No graduated stages of mental cognition. No aging over the whole of your life. Just young brains and mature brains.
If you’re unlucky, there’s a third stage. If you’re unlucky, there’s decay. The brain starts to stutter and falter. The you that is you starts to disappear.
I’ve been lucky so far.
Neither young nor old, what I feel like is me. I think perhaps there is no stage beyond not-young. I think maybe once you cross over into maturity, that’s it. That is not to our development is finished. But I think once you cross over, it starts to become about the deepening.
This is not an original thought though it’s been on my mind. I’ve heard it from others, some who are younger than me and some who are significantly older. They don’t affiliate with a set point in time. They don’t feel represented by the earth’s passage around the sun. They simply feel like themselves. They become more sophisticated and nuanced in their thinking as time passes but they don’t feel old. They feel like themselves and that feels remarkably ageless despite the changes that time wreaks on the body.
Some people, I think, don’t get that click. Some people, I think, hold onto an immature brain forever. I wonder if they know? I suspect not. The presence of adults with immature brains would explain a lot, however.
Once young is left behind, we are mature. What we choose to do with that is up to us. How complex we choose to make our maturity is a personal choice.
From Famine to Feast. 
I enjoyed reading your post. I think about age often, the number versus how we feel. I think that, in general, people don’t feel as old as they are, and that’s a good thing. If we felt our years, there would be more people doing a lot less living. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think that’s very true. If I thought about being actually fifty, I’d probably feel compelled to be “adult” – whatever that is, and somewhat sedate and cautious. J Lo notwithstanding 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have always found myself feeling old mentally. Maybe because I seemed wiser/more mature for my age (is the horn-tooting loud enough?) than others. I’ve never felt “my age.” I hated it when people told me to act my age. I either wanted to act more or less mature depending on the situation. My soul is old, but I love acting young at times. I think you need to be playful on this dark, rocky road called life.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Some people are old souls. That’s not horn tooting. But yes, we still need to have fun of the non-knitting variety (apologies to those who embrace knitting passionately).
LikeLiked by 1 person
I called myself “wiser.” That’s what I was referring to when I wrote horn tooting.
LikeLike
Ahh. But then, I’d also consider you wise. The points you make and the thoughts you have are insightful.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, stop. You’re making me blush.
LikeLiked by 1 person