Tag: recovery

Mental Health

Resentment is a bitch

I have some resentments. Some are old ones I take out and air periodically and some are new, a result of day to day living. I don’t like having them. Resenting things makes me feel small and petty and with the old ones, vindictive; when I revisit them, I often wish ill upon the targets of my ire.

I don’t like having bad feelings. Their emergence, however, is an inevitable consequence of life. How we deal with them is where the work needs to happen…
Continue reading Resentment is a bitch

Unknown's avatarMichelle2 Comments
eating disorders, Mental Health

making chili, an exercise in recovery

I made a vegetarian chili this weekend. I’m not sure how much actual cooking was involved. It was mostly opening cans and dumping them in a crock pot. True, I chopped up the onions and celery and added the spices. Perhaps I’ll call it “cooking-light”.

Still, it’s a step in the right direction, a step away from the way I currently eat.

Learning to eat in recovery is hard. An eating disorder takes away your ability to interact with food in a “normal” way. Food is either good or bad. Good food is low calorie and a high water content. Bad food is everything else…
Continue reading making chili, an exercise in recovery

Unknown's avatarMichelle7 Comments
Mental Health

200 posts – thank you.

“I had a look at the stats page on my blog the other morning; something I almost never do. I try not to be invested in results. I write because I feel compelled to, because it helps me, because it might help someone else, and because it lets me connect with interesting people. I don’t want to grow angst-ridden about market share.

The timing of the peek was serendipitous. The post counter has me at one-hundred and ninety-nine posts, making this number two-hundred.

I feel compelled to created something spectacular, yet, remain stymied over what to say.

I wasn’t going to write today…”
Continue reading 200 posts – thank you.

Unknown's avatarMichelle5 Comments
eating disorders

Failing at my eating disorder.

“I’m failing at my eating disorder and my eating disorder voice reminds me of that fact incessantly. She’s a bitch that way.

I feel bad about failing, which is odd, considering that I’m mourning the absence of incredibly destructive behaviours. We miss what we know, even if it’s negative; we miss the loss of the familiar.

I’m failing because I’m eating…” Continue reading Failing at my eating disorder.

Unknown's avatarMichelle24 Comments