When one considers that I’ve struggled with diagnosed major depressive disorder since nineteen, my consistent failure to notice when I’m once again fighting the black dog seems surprising. Then again, even though I know in my bones that depression often has little to do with being overtly sad when I’m not sad, I can misdiagnose the issue. Identifying that you have a problem when you … Continue reading My depression is unproductive, not apathetic.
I’m a putterer. I have been my whole life. I don’t multitask while doing it anymore; it’s more akin to parallel processing these days. On usual days, I bounce between the three or four things I want to get done. It’s an improvement over “back in the day,” when I managed two or three things concurrently while still trying to hit four units of accomplishment. … Continue reading How’s your hippocampus?
How do you find new people when you discover that your people aren’t your people, and the convenient school years of enforced proximity friendship are but a memory? How do you convince your kids to listen to your advice? How do you get them to do things not the hard way? How do you apologize to your parents for ignoring the plentiful good advice, despite … Continue reading Occasional thoughts.
I was walking to the corner store to buy candy with my meagre allowance one bright summer morning, skipping cracks because who wants a mother with a broken back, and when I looked up, I was fifty-two. There’s a lifetime in the gap, but I forget all too often the history in my history, focusing only on the ugly bits, which, excluding the eating disorder … Continue reading Criticism or celebration?
From Famine to Feast 