I don’t like doughnuts. I find them greasy and mostly unsatisfying. I wonder if I’d have developed an affection for them if I hadn’t developed an eating disorder. Foods like doughnuts are forbidden. They’re empty calories that will definitely make you fatter than you are. You eat a doughnut when you have an eating disorder, and your brain will lecture you about that personal failure … Continue reading Apple fritters for breakfast.
I haven’t spent a day without at least one open wound on my person since I was nineteen, usually on my face. My work on eating disorder recovery is going well, but learning not to cut obsessively at the “imperfections” on my face is harder. [i] A combination of things led to the pattern of behaviour that doctors and other smart people now want to … Continue reading The healing of (passive aggressive) wounds.
I decided to make a mix of dirt and diatomaceous earth to spoon on the houseplants rather than try and add the dusty stuff loose. I’m having a problem with fungal gnats; when you have as many houseplants as I do, that’s an issue. I’ve been using the sticky traps Doctor Google suggested, but that only captures them after the fact, and they seem … Continue reading I’m pretty sure I’m (not) fine.
(I have plans to write things relevant and recent. I have notes on my desk and thoughts in my head. I jotted something down in my journal the other day, aided by my decision to toss the diary I’d started but couldn’t love. Happiness is a spiral binding, at least when it comes to me and my notebooks. Eating disorders are hell. Recovery is also … Continue reading i see you.
From Famine to Feast 