I loved the idea of homeostasis when it was first introduced in grade eight biology.

It is as follows: the tendency toward a relatively stable equilibrium between interdependent elements, especially as maintained by physiological processes.

That definition, however, hurts the brain. I’m reasonably certain that it was expressed differently to me when I was thirteen. To the best of my recollection, the definition was simple. The process of homeostasis is the process of maintaining a steady state.

I want that…
Continue reading In search of a steady state.

I’m afraid, almost all the time. Although I have phobias regarding certain things, spiders for example, this is not that kind of fear. This is a fear or nothing and everything and it’s with me all the time; it’s in my bones, written into my operating system. It impedes my ability to do almost everything. It makes me want to stay in my house, in my room, where I know it’s safe. Where I won’t have to deal with people. It makes me not want to deviate from my routine to try and control it and keep it at bay. Because the fear is awful, and I want more than anything to feel safe, and in order to do so, I keep my world small… Continue reading I can take care of myself.