I didn’t love my therapy appointment this week. I felt absent. I didn’t talk about what was bothering me except in the most sideways of fashions. I got there after discussing everything and everything else. A side note as I was leaving. “By the way, I think my depression is getting worse.” Except, I think I was mistaken. I’m depressed, it’s true, but that’s not … Continue reading Why did I react so strongly?
My world has become odd. I’m anhedonic much of the time. Luckily, I have practice faking it. But between PTSD and pending grief, times are tough. Add very ill parents who need daily help, my own issues, and friends trapped in their own worlds of pain, and suddenly, dissociating makes sense. Being flat keeps me safer but my creativity takes a hit. It’s driven by … Continue reading Share your world.
I like spring cleaning. Not the cleaning part, per se. That part is less than thrilling: the first thing that happens after I win the lottery is the hiring of someone to clean my homes. Okay, maybe the third thing after vacation and real estate moguldom. But since neither dusting nor vacuuming makes me rapturous, domestic duties will get farmed out right quick. The organizing … Continue reading Spring cleaning and mental health.
An “off-the-cuff” entry. It’s been a while. [i] I started today with a near-panic attack which sounds like a good thing to everyone who doesn’t suffer from panic attacks. “Near” is still gross. I couldn’t find my purse this morning. I wanted yesterday’s receipts to record in my ledger. [ii] This is the problem when you are “organized” like me. If something isn’t in its … Continue reading Did you think adulting would give you answers?
From Famine to Feast 