How old were we when someone first spoke to us about trust? Was it a warning – trust me, you don’t want to know – or a request to behave – I know I can trust you to be a good girl? How was the concept of trust first articulated to us? I have no idea. We experience it before we can put a name … Continue reading Trust is a responsibility.
It’s been a rough week. I’d been getting a little thin, so I thought I’d gain a little weight. I didn’t talk to anyone beforehand, of course. At any rate, I’ve gained some, but between working on my body dysmorphia and a strained effort at reconnection by my daughter (I can hear my counsellor’s voice, “why are you giving her this much power over you,” … Continue reading Early memes were fun.
TW: frank talk about mental illness, cutting, blood Body dysmorphia My obsession with my appearance began young, but self-mutilation only started in my twenties. It was tied to my eating disorder – cutting and picking at my face were part of my bulimic process – but it’s also an entity of its own and hasn’t stopped with my eating disorder recovery, though it’s significantly less … Continue reading Body dysmorphic disorder (BDD)
“If I could turn back time” isn’t a wish to go back in time. To me, the latter is a jump of some significance – to the third grade or to 1653. The former is usually event-specific – I want a do-over for that one thing. For instance, I would have held onto my hockey cards from 1982. My estranged daughter texted me yesterday. I … Continue reading If I could turn back time – an off-the-cuff joint.
From Famine to Feast 