Recovery and growth, things that interest me, occasional deep-thoughts, and random poetry.
Why isn’t what I do “living a life”? Because I don’t consider it to be. I’m always vaguely apologetic when people ask “what do you do?” I shuffle and deflect and respond that I don’t do much, I kind of write, sort of, it’s nothing really. I dismiss how I spend my days and give the impression that writing isn’t really that important to me...
The universe gives you what you need, some of the time. I was having a very anxious day yesterday and decided to log onto WordPress to catch up on people’s posts. Waiting for me was a message, and what a lovely one it was. I would like to thank Jill for the nomination for the Sunshine Blogging Award. It’s such a pleasure, knowing that people read the things I write, and enjoy them, and maybe get something from them. I love the feeling of connection blogging gives me, the feeling that I’m a member of a community.
I have some resentments. Some are old ones I take out and air periodically and some are new, a result of day to day living. I don’t like having them. Resenting things makes me feel small and petty and with the old ones, vindictive; when I revisit them, I often wish ill upon the targets of my ire. I don’t like having bad feelings. Their emergence, however, is an inevitable consequence of life. How we deal with them is where the work needs to happen...
"I want to take a moment to thank everyone who took the time to read one of the posts I put out there into the online universe, or who followed me. I am beyond grateful. When I started putting my writings online, I had no expectations. No actual, real-world expectations, that is. In the secret part of my heart that likes to fantasize, I imagined an explosive, unprecedented success, perhaps even a Pulitzer in recognition of the stellar qualities found in my internal musings. I spent a lot of time in that fantasy; I pull out of the real world with alarming frequency. It’s quite a negative – it keeps me from reality and stops me from living. I get trapped in imaginary realms that, at times, seem more real than the world at hand."
a child looks on
as voices rant and rail.
a single tear falls
"
I'm trying out the new WordPress editor and we'll have to see how it goes. It's a change, and I don't like change.
I'm not alone in this; I think most of us prefer the status quo, however, often times the things we are seeking to preserve are better off binned.
"
"on this dark and quiet night,
my only companion is the flicker of the dashboard lights.
my thoughts are at rest,
i am steeped in rote as i retrace
the well-known path toward home..."
