Posts about, among other things, mental illness, mental health, and recovery.
I do some of my best thinking when my brain is acting up. And when I’m depressed. I write some of my best poetry when darkness descends, something that annoys me a little; it’s such a trite and expected thing. I get philosophical when my brain is acting up. I get contemplative. I search for a purpose. It’s all very deep. I also do bad … Continue reading Some of my best thinking.
The fridge is bursting. There’s too much food in the house. Definitely a problem of privilege. I’m aware of that, yet my problems are my problems, real and difficult for me; other people’s different problems don’t negate my reality. I’ve had this issue before. I don’t do it to myself – I’m careful about the quantities I maintain – so the stress-inducing over-capacity isn’t my … Continue reading The fridge is bursting.
I forgot the anniversary of my grandmother’s birthday this year. It’s the first time that’s happened since she died. I realized, once I remembered, that after I’m gone, she really will be dead. All the way dead. The people who live only in my memory will be gone as if they never were, lost save for a marker somewhere, if that. My children never met … Continue reading When I die.
I won’t be getting my happily ever after, at least not the kind that shows up in the romance novels I read and collect and have been devouring of late. I love those stories. It’s one of those secret things I wanted, a partner to grow old with and a big family. The lack thereof makes me sad sometimes. It’s not going to happen, at … Continue reading The loss of the original “happily ever after”.
From Famine to Feast 