Author: Michelle

I've lived with mental illness my whole life. I walk hand-in-hand with my neuroses these days, and sometimes I write about what that's like for me. I prefer the peaceful coexistence of détente to the open warfare of the past. I'm also in recovery from an eating disorder that ate decades of my life, pun intended. It's been hard: recovery is very much a walk through hell - the rainbows, puppies, and chocolate fountains come later - but it's worth it. Recovery lets you have the life the eating disorder promises and lies about 💜
Mental Health, off the cuff

Flashing back – an off-the-cuff joint.

I’ve added a new page to my blog. I’m going to be putting all my eating disorder posts on one, easy-to-ignore page. I can’t believe I haven’t over-organized my page before now. So many sub-categories are pending. I also can’t believe I started. It’s going to be a big job. I’m coming up on my six-year Word Press anniversary and I’ve concluded that I write … Continue reading Flashing back – an off-the-cuff joint.

Unknown's avatarMichelle8 Comments
Mental Health, poetry

Not too hot, not too cold.

I love watching “Miss Congeniality.” It’s funny without descending into the overtly stupid. And while there are gem-moments aplenty – who doesn’t want to do UV paint drumming with Sandra Bullock? – I think perhaps my favourite scene is the contestant interviews that take place early in the competition. In response to being asked to describe her perfect date, Cheryl, the sweetly naïve Miss Rhode … Continue reading Not too hot, not too cold.

Unknown's avatarMichelle4 Comments
Mental Health

Recovering from eating disorders.

Eating disorders have one goal: they want you dead. They hide that under “be thin, be fit, be healthy, be perfect, be beautiful,” but they don’t actually care about those things. If they did, the goalposts wouldn’t continually move. You can’t win with an eating disorder and living while trying to maintain it is a halflife. When you give up alcohol or drugs, you can … Continue reading Recovering from eating disorders.

Unknown's avatarMichelle5 Comments
Mental Health

Gluten, aspartame, and food allergies, oh my.

Four weeks ago, I started an elimination diet to check for food allergies and intolerances. It’s been suggested for years but I’ve been resistant. My eating disorder is fine with it controlling what I eat, but less down with other people’s impositions. I suppose that’s ironic, a structured eating situation unwilling to accept another structured eating situation? Part of it’s control – I dislike not … Continue reading Gluten, aspartame, and food allergies, oh my.

Unknown's avatarMichelle11 Comments