"i write about self-care a lot and think about it even more but my execution of the same is still intermittent and challenging, which i suppose is why it remains on my mind."
"from a journal after a hard day: “my eating disorder makes me angry, mean, full of sharp edges, wholly self-centered, and judgmental as hell.” i suppose this is true for almost everyone who struggles; i know it’s true for me. catch me around a binge; i’m not a pleasant person to encounter. i’m angry and short-tempered, and i lash out in an effort to mitigate my guilt and self-hatred. i want people to hurt when i hurt. i want someone to blame."
"persist and resist...persist in our efforts to live well and resist those things that would drag us down. pretty much the perfect slogan for those of us slogging our way through recovery, be it from substances, behaviours, mental illnesses, or a combination thereof."
"it’s challenging when it feels like your brain is out of your control; when it persists in thinking thoughts you’d rather it didn’t...i have spent a significant quantity of time ranting and raving over my inability to shut down my brain and to deny these thoughts life. no matter the internal or external volume, repeatedly berating myself didn’t work. something new was needed..."